We have a secret to share. You see, all these years, we’re sure you’ve been hearing about Hedgezilla, famed savior of Tokyo and all around amazing gargantuan hedgehog. What you did not know is that this is our secret identity. Thanks to a leak by Hedgehog World News our secret is public, so we wanted to share a few notable moments from our story.
Long ago, when we were young, there was baby Hedgezilla, still learning to save major metropolitan areas and bring wonder and delight to concerned citizens by smashing things.
Soon we learned valuable skills like radiation-breath that kept King Ghidorah at bay.
Though sometimes we just had to manage things the old fashioned way.
Super-quill powers activated, failure was not an option in our mission to protect the world from King Ghidorah.
We also saved the world from Anguirus, a somewhat hedgehog-like kaiju.
Mothra was very uncomfortable when we visited, since Mothra larva look very delicious.
Eventually we became friends, though, playing radiation-breath games together.
At times we faced our arch-nemesis Mecha-Hedgezilla with grace and aplomb and a few other fitting adjectives.
These were notable enough that there was a movie about it you probably remember.
In addition to Tokyo, we also protected Kyoto.
Unfortunately our efforts to protect San Francisco went more poorly.
Sometimes protecting Tokyo also went poorly.
Frolicking on Monster Island was always delightful.
And while initially we didn’t get along well with King Kong…
Eventually we grew close, thanks to the power of good manners, grace, and politeness.
While by day we are a mild-mannered hedgehog art historian, world explorer, pirate, and entrepreneur, by day we also sometimes transform into a world-saving super force.
So now you know.